How to Know if Ex Is Thinking About You
So I like to create my content around the things I see that people are struggling with, and this is a topic that crops upwardly fourth dimension and time again… how to stop thinking about your ex.
Run into it's skillful to process what's happened. It'southward an important function of healing. But there comes a point where you just have to let things become and move on.
If yous feel like your ex is on your listen far more than yous'd similar them to be, and it's not healthy or productive, then here's how you tin stop thinking about them… or to at least get them out of your head for a little while, and gradually make information technology less and less!
1) Cut All Contact
If you lot don't believe in the no-contact dominion one time your relationship has ended, so I've got a mail service coming up all nearly that which is going to Blow YOUR MIND!
It also runs through why the no-contact dominion might not be working (+ what to practise most it in that situation) and any answers to the reasons you're telling yourself to justify keeping contact.
Please annotation: there are some circumstances where some contact with an ex is required. Like for case, if you lot take children together. Only in these cases, when we talk about no-contact, it'due south no contact aside from what is 10000% mandatory… the remainder notwithstanding applies okay?
But cut contact with your ex really helps you to stop thinking about them. If y'all notice this hard and so this mail service runs through all the different things y'all can do INSTEAD of texting your ex. Information technology's not but about distractions merely finding positive outlets instead of doing damaging things.
Another thing I recommend? Blocking them. On everything. Their number, their social media channels. It sounds farthermost but it's not… out of sight out of mind as they say.
And sure it'due south not that piece of cake, only it does help considering yous're then not checking your phone, waiting for a bulletin. Y'all know it'south not happening because it'south not possible so it stops y'all fifty-fifty beingness able to read into anything. This leads me onto my next bespeak…
Recommended Read: 10 Actually-Helpful Questions To Ask Your Ex Before
2) Stop The Stalking!
I know, we've all been at that place, we've all done information technology… simply if you're withal doing it – it's got to stop. I mean it. Block them if yous tin can't resist the temptation.
If you want to stop thinking virtually your ex, you have to practise the things that are going to help you, and watching their life without you, certainly isn't.
Call up, only because you see something on social media, doesn't mean information technology's fifty-fifty an accurate reflection of their life. Yet you'll see things, and it volition hurt.
Recommended Read: Should I Block My Ex On Social Media?
Recommended Read: How To Stop Obsessing Over Your Ex
Fifty-fifty staring at their face once again is going to do more damage than good. Which reminds me…
iii) Go Rid Of All The Reminders
The photos on your phone, the things he/ she bought y'all. You don't need to throw them out or delete them for practiced.
With the photos for case – just transfer them onto a backup drive and then that they're not hands accessible but it doesn't intermission your eye getting rid of the memories forever.
After all, they were still a office of your life and you lot may look back one 24-hour interval and smile at this chapter, without feeling any sadness or acrimony. But for at present, things are still besides raw so – out of sight, out of mind.
Box upwardly any of those gifts etc too. Or if y'all don't actually demand to exist holding onto them, give them to charity – in that location'southward a better cause out there that tin can requite you that experience-good boost!
4) Have That It's Over
I of the most common reasons that keeps you thinking most your ex, is because y'all haven't truly accepted that it's over and a part of y'all is still clinging onto the hope that you will reconnect. It's hard, I know. And sometimes we're doing this without even realising.
If this sounds familiar, click here . It will open in a new tab so you won't lose your place on this postal service. This article runs through the process of gaining credence and allowing yourself to allow get.
You're moving onto bigger and ameliorate things – not simply with the right person next fourth dimension, simply more importantly for yourself at present.
5) Remove The Rose-Tinted Glasses
Another thing that'due south going to help yous non only to have that it'southward over, but to stop thinking nigh your ex so much, is to remove those rose-tinted glasses.
You might have had some good times, but the chances are if you broke up – at that place were their fair share of bad times too. The relationship wasn't perfect, and nor was your ex.
And then if you want to finish thinking nigh him / her so much, you have to stop replaying all the good times that are distorting your outlook, and remember why information technology did end. This post will assist you to gain a more than accurate moving picture around it all.
Yous can also endeavor this… every time your ex pops into your head, and you're thinking about a good time, or a good quality of theirs – supervene upon it with a bad i.
Literally kicking that good memory out of your head and see the bad affair take over. It sounds negative but you demand to shift your perspective right now.
Somewhen you won't demand to exercise this. You'll merely run across information technology for what it was and have no extreme emotions when thinking of your by relationship.
But if y'all're struggling to get your ex out of your heed, you're non quite there yet, so we're going to have to try some different strategies to keep y'all sane.
This leads me onto another suggestion…
half-dozen) Endeavor The Elastic Band Technique
I absolutely love this one. It's probably my all-fourth dimension favourite on this list, then don't scoff until y'all've tried information technology, okay?
The elastic band technique (or otherwise known as the safety band technique) is used to destroy negative thinking or negative habits. Information technology's so unproblematic, just it's so effective, considering it changes your automatic response and snaps yous back into reality!
- Basically, you wear a rubber band around your wrist (day and night!) It should loosely fit around your wrist, comfortably.
- Whenever you offset thinking about your ex, you snap the elastic band, pulling it back so it hits your wrist.
- You then replace that line of idea with something new… it could be a dissimilar focus, a positive affirmation, anything really. Simply decide beforehand on what yous're going to attempt, so stick to it.
Excessively thinking about your ex is not helping, so by using the rubberband band technique, we're grooming our mind to get more aware, to stop the thoughts in their tracks and focus on something different instead. Pretty neat huh? I actually used this immediately after my breakup and it was an accented godsend, and then trust me – information technology works!
7) Focus On Yourself More than
Do the things that brand you experience skillful, make self-intendance a priority , spend more time with your friends and family, hit the gym hard, progress in your career, work on developing yourself as a person .
Whether you like it or not, you're entering a new affiliate in your life, so try to stop going over the past by focusing on how you're going to movement forward.
Write a list of all the things you want to do, all the things you desire to experience, all the places you want to become… and start working through it! Get excited about life, and capeesh it.
I know it'due south easier said than washed, simply even but committing a pocket-sized amount of time daily, to doing things for yourself… over a short flow of time, information technology volition start to build up to change the way you feel. Peculiarly when you adopt the right mindset.
You lot need to see that at that place are far improve things ahead, and the best manner to do that, is to embrace everything that you can, and live a fiddling more fully.
eight) Cutting Out The Bad Habits
When we're in a bad place, information technology's easy to do more bad things because we remember "f*ck information technology!" but this is only going to brand things worse.
For example, we're not over the breakdown, we can't finish thinking about our ex and how badly we want them back – so we hit the bottle to drown our sorrows… but information technology doesn't work.
In fact, if anything, we overthink things even more and end upwards feeling lower. It's like when people go out and have a rebound directly after, thinking information technology will help them to move on, just to find it makes them experience worse.
So earlier you brand whatever decisions, ask yourself – is this actually going to help me? Non necessarily momentarily, just long-term? Is this going to support my progress? To movement me forward?
And if it's not, and then it's probably a practiced thought to go dorsum a pace and focus on the things that yous know will aid yous feel expert. Like burning that frustration off in the gym instead, or getting stuck into a expert book to escape for a footling while.
When yous do less or the bad stuff and more of the skilful, you will gradually become yourself back to feeling like you again, which in turn means you'll be thinking about your ex less and less.
nine) Learn To Forgive
So I've spoken about not accepting that things are over, reliving the 'best bits' of your relationship and non seeing it for what it is… but what if you can see information technology?
What if your ex betrayed your trust and shattered your heart and you just can't quite believe it, which is why they keep coming into your listen?
On the flip side, what if you made mistakes, or played your office in the breakdown, and y'all can't finish going over the 'what ifs' and regrets?
Both are completely different situations, just each require forgiveness – either for yourself or the other person. Sometimes even both. Until you lot forgive, you lot tin't truly let go, which is why your ex is now nevertheless on your listen.
Forgiveness doesn't mean that you have to similar the other person, or agree with what y'all did / how you behaved – it merely means that y'all're choosing to accept it and let become of information technology.
This post runs through how to let go of the mistakes you've made in by relationships . I also so have a couple more about how to move on when people take mistreated you, so if you subscribe to this blog at the bottom of this postal service, I'll notify you once it goes alive.
At that place's a process y'all have to become through through, and it's important. So don't overlook it or think yous can brush it under the carpet. Also recollect, this is what's going to aid you grow and become stronger. Then it's actually a good thing.
10) Meet That There Are Other People Out There
Terminal merely not least, it'south time to look forward. Like I briefly mentioned above, I personally don't recollect that jumping from 1 person to the adjacent will aid you to stop thinking about your ex.
Why? Because you're not really dealing with things properly. You're looking for an escape. And it won't last.
But if you've accepted that information technology'south over, began to encounter things for what they actually were, take started to focus on yourself again – then I think you lot're prepare to get yourself back out there in the dating earth… Not because you're desperately searching to find someone, but because yous want to have some fun again!
And dating Tin be heaps of fun – but only when you're in the right headspace. And then when you're ready, try out some dating apps, become speaking to different people, relish getting to know people, maybe keep a few dates.
Once you kickoff building a connection with someone else and have that person there to speak to, your ex volition be on your mind far less – trust me. So this one is a big one!
How To Stop Thinking About Your Ex
I promise this give you a piddling insight into how to stop thinking about your ex.
Remember, we're not trying to block out feelings here. We're just stopping bad habits that are belongings united states of america back and looking to movement forward again.
For this reason, talking is also skillful – to friends, family and professionals. Also classify set times to work through this kind of stuff, and then that your ex isn't however taking over your life fifty-fifty subsequently things are over.
For one-to-one private breakup back up – click hither for more than details. Simply know that yous're not solitary, okay?
Take care.
Love,
Ell_xx
Source: https://www.forgettingfairytales.com/how-to-stop-thinking-about-your-ex/
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